Tuesday, October 24, 2006
ticked?
Maybe ticked I guess more confused than anything else. The topic today, smoking. I quit smoking in 1997. Well OK I quit smoking the FINAL time in 1997 when I found out I was pregnant (I had quit when I was pregnant with my first too). From that point on I didn't smoke. My husband quit back about 2001 ish. Now I am the worst well they do say that ex-smokers are the worst. I cannot stand the smell. It turns my stomach. My husband has come home recently, gone directly to the bathroom, washed his hands and hit the Listerine. I am not an idiot I know he has been smoking. It is not working hon I can smell it on you, I know it when I kiss you, I can smell it on your hands too.
I open up his travel credit card statement today (while he was on the phone we were figuring out if he paid enough) and I see a couple of charges I KNOW were for cigarettes. No one goes to a gas station and spends $4 on gas ;)
What bugs me so much?? he is lying about it. If you love me you don't lie to me period. OK if I lose all of my senses and ask somethig idiotic like does my ass look fat in this sure lie to me. However chances are I will never seriously ask that question because I KNOW the answer lol
I am hurt by the lying to tell you the truth. And confused. Why does he smoke when he is away from home and at work? Should I look at it as at least we do not stress him out enough at home to drive him to smoking? haha Is it the lack of productivity at work? Is it work stress? Is it him wanting to be one of the cool kids and he gave in to peer pressure?
Ugh frustration abounds. If I could think like a guy (though I have been accused of that) I might be able to figure him out. But as it stands now I have no clue WTF is going through his mind. Maybe I don't want to know?
Again one last time I will say the lying bothers me A LOT. Because my mind goes automaticaly to what ELSE is he hiding?
I open up his travel credit card statement today (while he was on the phone we were figuring out if he paid enough) and I see a couple of charges I KNOW were for cigarettes. No one goes to a gas station and spends $4 on gas ;)
What bugs me so much?? he is lying about it. If you love me you don't lie to me period. OK if I lose all of my senses and ask somethig idiotic like does my ass look fat in this sure lie to me. However chances are I will never seriously ask that question because I KNOW the answer lol
I am hurt by the lying to tell you the truth. And confused. Why does he smoke when he is away from home and at work? Should I look at it as at least we do not stress him out enough at home to drive him to smoking? haha Is it the lack of productivity at work? Is it work stress? Is it him wanting to be one of the cool kids and he gave in to peer pressure?
Ugh frustration abounds. If I could think like a guy (though I have been accused of that) I might be able to figure him out. But as it stands now I have no clue WTF is going through his mind. Maybe I don't want to know?
Again one last time I will say the lying bothers me A LOT. Because my mind goes automaticaly to what ELSE is he hiding?
