Gina's Ramblings

OK everytime I hear it, see it or say it I want to say (and I think) Ass burgers.
But I tell you raising a child that has Asperger tendencies is a pain in the ass, in the Ass Burger even ;) See I do keep my sense of humor ;)

Let's look at some of the symptoms (taken from Web MD

Not pick up on social cues and lack inborn social skills, such as being able to read others' body language, start or maintain a conversation, and take turns talking.
Dislike any changes in routines.
Appear to lack empathy.
Be unable to recognize subtle differences in speech tone, pitch, and accent that alter the meaning of others’ speech. Thus, your child may not understand a joke or may take a sarcastic comment literally. Likewise, his or her speech may be flat and difficult to understand because it lacks tone, pitch, and accent.
Have a formal style of speaking that is advanced for his or her age. For example, the child may use the term “beckon” instead of “call,” or “return” instead of “come back.”
Avoid eye contact.
Have unusual facial expressions or postures.
Be preoccupied with only one or few interests, which he or she may be very knowledgeable about. Many children with Asperger's syndrome are overly interested in parts of a whole or in unusual activities, such as doing intricate jigsaw puzzles, designing houses, drawing highly detailed scenes, or astronomy.2
Talk a lot, usually about a favorite subject. One-sided conversations are common. Internal thoughts are often verbalized.
Have delayed motor development. Your child may be late in learning to use a fork or spoon, ride a bike, or catch a ball. He or she may have an awkward walk. Handwriting is often poor.
Have heightened sensitivity and become overstimulated by loud noises, lights, or strong tastes or textures.

Big Ol' CHECK on all of the above

Now let's look at the issues this causes as a teen...

Symptoms during adolescent and teen years

Most symptoms persist through the teen years, and although teens with Asperger's can begin to learn those social skills they lack, communication often remains difficult. They will probably continue to have difficulty "reading" others' behavior.

Your teen with Asperger's syndrome (like other teens) will want friends but may feel shy or intimidated when approaching other teens. He or she may feel "different" from others. Although most teens place emphasis on being and looking "cool," trying to fit in may be frustrating and emotionally draining for teens with Asperger's. They may be immature for their age and be naive and too trusting, which can lead to teasing and bullying
All of these difficulties can cause teens with Asperger's to become withdrawn and socially isolated and to have depression or anxiety.3.

However, some teens with Asperger's syndrome are able to make and keep a few close friends through the school years. Some of the classic Asperger's traits may also work to the benefit of your teen. Teens with Asperger's are typically uninterested in following social norms, fads, or conventional thinking, allowing creative thinking and the pursuit of original interests and goals. Their preference for rules and honesty may lead them to excel in the classroom and as citizens.

The areas in bold are specific concerns now. He does not know how to act in front of groups so he goes for attention. But in a negative way. Trying to gross everyone out by eating something on the floor or making sexual gestures. While he thinks this will make friends it pushes them away and they turn him into the little trained monkey asking him to do things that even he knows are wrong just for their amusement. This also extends to him "buying" their affection in the form of stealing from us or the shoplifting incident(s).

Add AS to the normal teen social difficulties and things are tough all around.
Got another call from the school today. Another incident, well rather incidents on the bus. He is no longer allowed on the bus. Well his counselor and I thought it was the best course of action to remove him from the mainstream bus. I am positive his bus driver breathed a sigh of relief as well. After Spring break he will be picked up by.... the short bus. UGH You know it is so hard. You have a child who struggles to be accepted by his peers yet the only course of action you have is to possibly ostracize him further. Yet this is truly the only route we have other than me schlepping him back and forth to school. With gas prices the way they are and how far away school is... yeah it would be tough.
The good news is the other bus comes later and picks him up at the house so he will not be outside with his peers and have to get on the short bus.
I loe the boy I do. I also do not expect him to be part of the mainstream. I am ALL for individuality. BUT there is a line between being different and being a disturbance. I still do not care if he wants to wear all black, color his hair blue or whatever. But he cannot make others lives so damn hard. I swear I am on the verge of hypocrite here. Be yourself, but do it quietly? That is not what I am trying to instill in my kids, honestly.
OK this was a long post, if you did make it this far....well you are more intersted in what I think than most ;) And I appreciate you for that!